Receiving feedback gracefully at work is a career enhancing skill that will allow you achieve your dreams. Arva Shikari helps you begin on a positive note

Whether it is the annual performance review, a new project, handling a difficult customer or socialising at work- receiving feedback on our work and/ or personality has never been easy. Typically, we all have a contrived self image.When this comes in direct conflict with how others perceive us, an intense internal strife takes place and almost everybody responds defensively, creating a negative atmosphere at work.
Contrary to this popular corporate phenemenon, professionals today need to gracefully receive constructive feedback from others.To begin with one needs to change the way they feel about receiving feedback.

Receiving Feedback
Negative feedback makes one feel victimised and let down. But one needs to first analyse the origin of the feedback before taking it too seriously. In cases of deliberate criticism make it your goal to remain unaffected and work towards improving the situation. For example, if you hear something you don’t agree with, simply say, “That’s interesting!” and ask questions to clarify what you did was wrong. Acknowledge what is true, but stand firm on your position. Prior to taking any action, take some time to think it over. Check with others to determine the reliability of the feedback. If only one person believes it about you, it may be that person, not you.To control your defensiveness, practice stress management techniques like taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly; understand the feedback by questioning or summarising it, which defuses hostile feelings; confront, only when your emotions are under control.

Valuable feedback affirms the worth of the person and shows that the giver is sensitive to your needs and goals. Here is some food for thought on how to receive feedback gracefully:

• Have a positive attitude
• Be open to different perspectives
• Practice listening
• Be objective
• Avoid mind reading
• Keep an emotional balance
• Focus on facts
• Take both praise and criticism in your stride Zohara-tus-sharaf Kapadia a senior copywriter in a media company asserts that “Feedback, whether positive or negative is acceptable provided it be constructive. Only then it truly helps in working on your weaknesses and building on your strengths.”

Acting on Feedback
Accept productive feedback: If it is regarding specific behaviour or instance then accepting feedback will prove to be useful. For example, your colleague suggests that you smile while interacting with customers at help desk; it will improve your conduct at work.

• Assess feedback : Check the quality of the feedback. Is it genuine or abusive? Ask yourself if there is any truth in it.
• Be rational : It is tough to receive feedback, but do not sulk or withdraw from the person giving the feedback.Take time out and boost your self-esteem.
• Opt to use feedback : If the feedback allows you to grow and develop as a person, at work or personally, it’s a gift. However if it is futile, ignore it. Finally, it is your decision on how to act upon the feedback.
• Interact with feedback giver/s : Set a time and place to discuss the feedback. Openly share your views on the feedback.Ask for guidance on how to progress and discuss potential options.
• Plan changes : Be clear on what needs to be done differently. In case there are numerous things, prioritise accordingly.
• Commit to changes : Select your actions and follow up on them with specific dates.This will build an environment of trust and confidence at work.
• Thank the feedback giver : If the feedback has helped you thank the giver sincerely and express your appreciation.

Signing Off
A key aspect to bear in mind is the fact that feedback is ‘one opinion coming from another individual’s unique perspective’. It is up to you to consider it thoughtfully, evaluate it and do something constructive. Remember, it is impossible for us to see ourselves as others see us, but it is very important that we don’t allow these blind spots to endanger wonderful opportunities.

Courtesy: The Times Of India